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Uko wakwigobotora ingoyi yo guhora utekereza uwari umukunzi wawe

Yanditswe na Zigiranyirazo Bajecteur
Kuya 7 Kamena 2022 saa 08:14
Yasuwe :

Umubare munini w’abantu cyane ababashije gusogongera ku buryohe bw’urukundo, banezezwa nabyo ku buryo ushobora no kubabona bagenda bamwenyura bisetsa kubera kuba muri icyo kinovera cyarwo.

Ku rundi ruhande ariko hari ubwo mu rukundo bitagenda neza, abari baruhuriyemo bakagira ibyo batumvikanaho cyangwa bagashwana ku buryo nyuma y’ibyo bihe umwe ashobora kwisanga mu ihungabana rikomeye rimwomaho imyaka igashira indi igataha.

Amakuru meza ni uko umuntu adashobora kubana n’ibi ubuziraherezo igihe cyose akurikije inama zikurikira dukesha The Face.

Mu buhamya bw’umukobwa ufite imyaka 20, avuga ko nyuma yo gutandukana n’abo yise abakunzi babi ubwo yari muri icyo kigero, atababajwe cyane n’ibyo kumuca inyuma cyangwa ngo aterwe intimba n’ibyo kuba baramukoreshaga imibonano mpuzabitsina mu buryo yise ubutiyubashye, ahubwo yasheguwe n’umwanya yagiye abatakazaho ku buryo bitapfaga kumuva mu mutwe.

Izi ntekerezo zamuteraga agahinda, avuga ko zamufatiraga aho zishatse hose; yaba ari mu isoko agiye guhaha, ari gusoma igitabo cyangwa mu masaha y’akaruhuko ku mugoroba igihe abantu baba bari gutembereza imbwa zabo, aho agaragaza ko buri gihe yatungurwaga n’intekerezo zamwibutsaga imyaka ibiri yatakaje.

Imibare igaragaza ko 84% by’abagore na 75% by’abagabo, bakunda kwisanga barabaye mu rukundo rubi mu rwego runaka ku buryo rushobora kubasigira ibikomere rukanabatera ihungabana mu gihe abagera hafi kuri 60% ari bo bashobora kuba bakwigobotora ibyo bibazo bwangu bitagombye kubafata igihe kirekire ibitekerezo byo mu bihe banyuzemo mu rukundo byarababayemo nk’isereri.

Abandi 40% iyo bavuye muri urwo rukundo rwaranzwe n’imibanire mibi, bakunda kubana n’ihungabana aho usanga bahitamo kubaho ubuzima bwa nyakamwe atifuza kongera gusubira mu rukundo ku buryo bishobora kubaviramo kwiheba, agahinda gakabije no kubura ibitotsi.

Uwitwa Hattie ufite imyaka 26 avuga ko yanyuze mu bihe bikomeye nyuma yo kumarana n’umuhungu mu rukundo imyaka irindwi agasanga itandatu muri yo yashize umukunzi we amuca inyuma.

Bimwe mu byagufasha kwigobotora iri hungabana, ni ukugira ubushobozi bwo kwakira ko byabayeho kandi ugatsinda intekerezo zikumvisha ko nta rukundo ruzima ushobora kuzisangamo ikindi gihe wumva ko utazakundwa cyangwa ukumva ufite ubwoba bwo kuba wenyine no gutinya impinduka.

Ibi bisobanurwa na Dee Johnson, inzobere mu kuvura indwara zishingiye ku buzima bwo mu mutwe mu Bitaro bya Chelmsford muri Leta ya Massachusetts.

Yemeza ko bigora kwiyumvisha ko umuntu wakundaga ukanamera nk’uhinduye ubuzima bwawe igishoro muri we, yakwitura kukubabaza agatera umutima wawe igikomere kinakuviramo ihungabana.

Nubwo bishobora gufata igihe, Johnson avuga ko bikira, kandi bikanyura mu kubiganira no kuganirizwa kandi uwahuye nabyo akitabwaho mu buryo bwihariye.

Igisubizo cy’ibanze ukwiye kwihutira gushaka, ni icyo kwigobotora iki kibazo utarindiriye ko gikura ngo kikwarikemo ku buryo utangira gushaka no kwishakamo ibisubizo ukimara kumenya ko wari uri mu rukundo rutagamije icyiza.

Ibi ni ukubera ko iyo uhise ukuza uburakari n’agahinda muri wowe, utabasha kwiyemerera kwinjira mu mubano mushya ku buryo nyuma bigutera no kwisuzugura.

Ni byiza guhita ugerageza kugenda ubisohokamo gahoro gahoro ugashaka ibintu bishya bishobora ku kunezeza mu buzima bwa buri munsi. Ushobora kubikora uganira n’inshuti yawe ya hafi mukabasha guseka cyangwa ukagerageza kujya wandika ibintu byagushimishije uwo munsi.

Kuri iyi ngingo, abahanga bavuga ko byaba byiza ugerageje kwiyibutsa imibereho wari ufite mbere y’uko uhura n’uwo muntu wagukomerekeje ku buryo wanakwitoza uko wabagaho icyo gihe kuko biba bishobora kugufasha gusohoka mu buribwe urimo.

Ibi bigufasha kumera nk’ukangutse ukongera kwibona nyuma y’igihe runaka uba wari umaze warinjiye mu yindi si y’urukundo. Ubwirwa kugerageza kugura imyambaro mishya, kuba wasohokana n’inshuti zawe mukumva umuziki mukanabyina kuko bigufasha kongera kwibuka uwo uri we, uretse uwo wari umaze iminsi umenyereye mu rukundo.

Mu buhamya bwatanzwe n’abantu batandukanye, hagaragaramo ko ushobora gukira binyuze mu nzira nyinshi, byaba gusura imbuga nkoranyambaga, gukora imyitozo ngororangingo hamwe n’abandi mukishimana mwasohokanye cyangwa se ukaba wanakwegera umuntu ubifiteho ubumenyi akakuganiriza akagufasha gutangira ubuzima bushya.

Umwe mu batanze ubuhamya yavuze ko yavuwe no gusoma amagambo amusubizamo ibyiringiro binyuze kuri internet aho yakomoje ku magambo agira ati “Baho ubuzima bwawe nk’aho ejo nta hahari”, “igihe kirahenze cyane, koresha icyawe neza.”

Yavuze ko ibi byamukanguye akabona ko adakwiye kuguma mu gahinda no kwiheba akabasha gutangira ubuzima bushya.

Kwibagirwa uwo mwakundanye biravuna ariko abahanga mu by'imitekerereze bagaragaza ko iyo ubishyizemo ubushake bishoboka

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