Birenze kurinda umugabo we ‘gushurashura’ mu bandi bagore bigatuma urugo rwe rurangwamo ituze n’akanyamuneza ka buri gihe hubakwa urukundo rwo mu buriri, umukobwa wakunnye byamuheshaga ikuzo mu bandi akitwa umwari w’umutima n’andi mazina amwubahisha mu muryango.

Kubera ko akamaro kabyo kabaga kazwi n’ababyeyi, umwana w’umukobwa hari imyaka yageragamo bakamucira amarenga ko agomba kubikora.

Umusizi akaba n’Umuhanga mu by’Umuco Nyarwanda, Nsanzabera Jean de Dieu, yavuze ko akenshi umukobwa yacaga imyeyo nyuma yo kujya mu mihango bwa mbere.

Ni igikorwa yikoreraga ku giti cye, nyuma yo kubwirwa n’ababyeyi cyangwa nyirasenge ko bikenewe. Bivugwa ko uwakoze imibonano mpuzabitsina adakuna ngo agwize.

Umwambaro w’ababyeyi…

Akamaro ko gukuna kabarwa mu buryo butatu, burimo kwiyubahisha no kubungabunga ubwiza bw’umwari no gushyigikira umuco no kubaka urugo neza.

Nsanzabera yasobanuye ko gukuna wari umutako ku mukobwa, bikamwongerera uko agaragara neza mu maso y’abagabo.

Ati “Gukuna ni ururabo [ku mukobwa].Ni na yo mpamvu abakobwa babaga batarakunnye babitaga ngo ni ba ‘Nyirakirimubusa’ cyangwa ‘Keso Karangaye’ n’andi mazina y’ibitutsi babahaga mu rwego rwo kubatesha agaciro.”

“Umukobwa wabaga yarakunnye yabaga ari umunyamutima, abantu bakamwubaha kuko yabaga azi ubwenge nyine yaramenye kwiyitaho.”

Guca imyeyo kandi ngo yari n’inzira yo kuzashimisha umugabo mu gihe umwari azaba yubatse, ibyo yakunnye bikitwa ‘umwambaro w’ababyeyi’.

Yavuze ko hashingiwe ku miterere y’umubiri w’umugore, iyo utarakunnye abyaye imyanya ye y’ibanga irarangara, mu gihe uwakunnye bihita bitwikira “ukaba wagira ngo ni isugi nta n’icyabaye. Niyo mpamvu umukobwa utarabikoraga nta gaciro yabaga afite muri rubanda.”

Kwirengagiza gukuna byashoboraga gutuma umugore asendwa

Nubwo guca imyeyo byakorwaga ku bushake kuko umukobwa yumva akamaro ko kubikora, uwageraga igihe cyo gushaka umugabo atarabikoze byashoboraga gutuma yirukanwa mu rugo.

Ntibyarangiriraga aho, yahabwaga inkwenene mu bandi bati “Yabuze ubwenge umunsi ananirwa gukora imirimo y’abandi bakobwa.”

Nsanzabera yavuze ko mu byitabwagaho cyane iyo umukobwa yabaga agiye gushyingirwa, harebwaga niba yaraciye imyeyo kandi ari isugi.

Iyo umusore yasangaga umukobwa yarongoye ataraciye imyeyo, “bafataga ikibabi cy’iteke bakagishyira mu giseke, bakamuhereza ngo nashyire iwabo”.

Ngo iyo iwabo w’umukobwa babonaga abazaniye icyo kibabi, bamenyaga ko “bamusenze”.

Muri ibi bihe ho ntibikunze kubaho ko umugabo yirukana umugore amuhora icyo ariko humvikana kenshi amajwi y’abavuga ko abagabo babo babaca inyuma ngo kubera ko batakunnye.

Ibyo byatumye mu bihe bitandukanye abagore bamwe bahitamo kubikorera abandi nk’umwuga ndetse bakabishyura amafaranga atari make.

Kuba hakiriho abakuru bazi akamaro kabyo ndetse n’abato bakaba bakabwirwa, ni ibigaragaza ko gukuna bigikenewe.

Mu 2015 IGIHE yatambukije inkuru yari ikubiyemo ibyifuzo by’abagabo n’abagore basabaga ko “gukuna byajya byigishwa mu mashuri abanza” abana b’abakobwa bari hagati y’imyaka icyenda na 12 bakabyerekerwa nko mu mwiherero bari kumwe na mwarimu w’umugore.

Icyo gihe uwari Umuyobozi w’Inteko Nyarwanda y’Ururimi n’Umuco, [Nyakwigendera] Dr James Vuningoma, yavuze ko uwo mugenzo wigishirizwaga mu muryango.

Yagize ati “Hari ibintu bijyanye n’umuco byigishirizwa mu muryango si ngombwa ko bishyirwa mu nteganyanyigisho. Hari n’ibitabo bigenda byandikwa kuri uwo mugenzo kandi tuzi neza ko abana b’Abanyarwanda babisoma ku buryo imihango cyangwa imihango cyangwa imigenzo ishingiye ku muco izakomeza gusigasirwa.”

Mu bitabo bigaruka ku mugenzo wo gukuna, hari icya Nsanzabera Jean de Dieu cyitwa “Umuco mu Buvanganzo ”, icya Musenyeri Aloys Bigirumwami cyitwa “Imihango imigenzo n’imiziririzo mu Rwanda” n’ibindi.